Sister Elisabetha, Principal at St. Ann’s High School, Secunderabad, India, was a tall, stately, well-liked nun. Her imposing figure in a well-pressed habit and veil commanded respect. I remember her especially for her two edicts. First, “Don’t show all your thirty two teeth. Learn to smile like a lady.” The other was, “I do not ever want to hear that you are bored. There is always something to do.”
I was not quite able to embrace the first dictum. I just could not muster a demure smile, invariably sporting a Cheshire cat grin instead. The second counsel I integrated somewhat fiercely. Whenever I felt the smallest whiff of boredom, I got busy with something. I told myself it was a slippery slope I never wanted to go down. Alarm bells would go off and I scuttled to find a task to do, or an idea to focus on. I have shuddered at the thought of boredom.
The unease and discomfort that we experience when bored is enough to turn anyone off. People sometimes wonder if it is a reflection of who they are, wondering if it makes them boring. It is also true that when boredom runs amok or is left unchecked it can lead to poor decisions, mistakes and undesirable behaviors. Certainly children and especially adolescents are bored easily. But surely not adults. That quickly draws heavy judgement and raised eyebrows. Yet, boredom creeps up on us stealthily when we are not looking and we are left grappling with it.
In ‘The Upside of your Dark Side’ (2014), Todd Kashdan and Robert Biswas-Diener look at the rather dubious topic of boredom through a fresh lens. As positive provocateurs, they challenge the customary avoidance of boredom. The authors systematically peel off layers of this concept to reveal some interesting facts. “How could boredom be beneficial? In Hindu and Buddhist traditions, boredom is described as a precursor to insight and discovery.” They even refer to parents giving their children the space to be bored, because “grappling with this uncomfortable state is how kids discover what they’re interested in, quiet their mind, and find outlets to channel their energy.”
A 2020 article Let Your Brain Rest: Boredom Can Be Good For Your Health, in Neuroscience News states, “It is critical for brain health to let yourself be bored from time to time. It also turns out that when we are not busy with other thoughts and activities, we focus inward as well as on social interactions. Being bored can help foster creativity.”
James Danckert and John Eastwood in Out of my Skull – The Psychology of Boredom (2020) ask “What if we listened to boredom instead of banishing it?” They recommend reflecting on the situation at hand and using it to look towards the future to set new goals. We can all benefit by adopting an adaptive approach to boredom.
- Boredom can serve a loftier role.
- It can be a ‘functional tool’ that signals to you that your cravings for meaningful engagement are not being satisfied.
- It could be the motivator that lights a fire under you to pursue your purpose and passion.
- It might also be a warning sign of an unconscious bias towards a new situation.
- It prompts you to keep an open mind.
- Every now and then a good nudge to get us out of our habitual mode is welcome.
A client recently disclosed, “I had an interesting experience with boredom this week”. He decided to lean into that boredom until it drifted away on its own and he found the world became more colorful and engaging. Wisps of ideas of future projects floated up for him. It is as if our psyche is yearning for that space and quiet to come alive and generate new ideas. Instead of leading us to a closed, dark and dank space, it can guide us to an open, bright and sunny field.
- Sit with the boredom.
- Accept its presence.
- Notice the activity in the brain.
- Give it oxygen to become a full-fledged notion.
- Thank yourself for this freedom to be bored.
So, this summer, if a lethargic haze comes over you, or a pesky sluggishness takes you hostage, don’t be alarmed. Yield to your dark side, briefly. Harness its energy. There might be some unexpected revelations awaiting you. Untie the constraints of boredom and set yourself free.