A ship’s captain is confident in his ability to navigate his vessel with expertise and proficiency. He stays poised at the command deck overseeing his domain with singular self-assurance. He is secure in his vast knowledge and years of accrued experience. At the same time, he holds a healthy respect for the vagaries of nature and the unpredictability of the mighty ocean.
Being poised and self-assured in one’s ability to perform at a high level of excellence can be an exhilarating aphrodisiac. You are in charge of the ship and the open expanse of blue rolled out in front of you. Self-confidence is a positive attitude of your ability to handle a task, your job, the next challenge. You value your self-efficacy, set realistic goals and assert yourself effectively. You are good at what you do and you know it. Self-confidence is a highly valued virtue. By its very nature it commands respect and admiration.
However, if confidence is left unchecked, we stand the risk of slipping into complacence or over reaching into arrogance. We might be unaware of our blind spots, weaknesses and gaps in our knowledge. If the captain is unmindful of an upcoming storm, or ignores the choppy upsurges forcing him to chart a new course and change direction, his endeavor to steer the ship to safe harbor will be in vain. All his confidence will have come to naught if he does not stay present, alert and responsive to the constantly shifting reality. In addition to managing steering systems, he has to make bridge communications and ship to shore communications. He stays engaged with curiosity, open to new possibilities, and listening to incoming information. He is willing to change his opinion. To be willing to rethink he has to stay humble.
“If we care about accuracy we need to pay attention to our blind spots”, Adam Grant, Think Again: The Power of Knowing What You Don’t Know.
There is a difference between diffidence, self-doubt, and humility. Humility does not translate into weakness or impostor syndrome or inadequacy. Many people have the mistaken idea that it is a flaw. Instead, it keeps us grounded and opens us up to fresh perspectives and thus far unexplored ideas and outlooks. On the one hand you hold on to your confidence that you have rightfully earned and developed, and on the other hand, you keep your mind open to new learning. The upside of doubt is to motivate us to work harder, smarter and become more adept learners. It is refreshing, courageous and centering.
- Confidence is a sharply focused lens
- Humility is a reflective lens
- Confident humility is a corrective lens
“Most effective leaders are both confident and humble,” says Adam Grant. Humility without the heft of confidence makes you uncertain and tentative. It holds you back from making a decision or taking a stand. Confidence without the moderating of humility makes you rigid and unmoving. It boxes you into a self-righteous worldview. Finding that sweet spot between robust confidence and modest humility is the secret ingredient to soaring success. Try it. You will be creating your own inbuilt system of checks and balances. While one lifts you the other grounds you.
The last few days I have spent many hours at a hospital in care for my mother and I have had the benefit of interacting with the health care professionals there. A nurse said to me in a clear, matter of fact manner, “I am confident in my craft….. And I want to keep gaining experience to grow.” He displayed crisp confident humility.